Three months ago I decided to make a change. I signed up for my first gym membership in over a decade. I was nervous (I think they call us Resolutioners), excited & ready to give it my all. I was sick of living a mediocre kind-of-healthy lifestyle.
Secretly, I was most excited about the (up to) two hours of alone time, away from my kids. I know how bad that sounds. But it’s not bad. Moms need to take care of themselves, too. You can’t pour from an empty cup. Of course, I feel guilty saying that but it’s true. I am with my kids & oncall 168 hours a week – on average. I deserve up to 14 hours a week to myself.
I had no idea how much a hard workout would change me. At first I wondered if it was really worth everything it took to go to the gym. If you know me, you know I don’t carry a diaper bag. Unless we are planning a trip for an entire day. My kids don’t wear socks (their choice, not mine). Their shoes are kept in the car. They refuse to wear them & if I put them on before leaving the house, I spend 30 minutes searching for 6 tiny shoes in my SUV.
It was taking an hour to get us out of the house. 15 minutes to get 3 kids out of the truck, socks, shoes, hats, jackets on, in the stroller, making sure I had sippy cups, snacks, extra clothes, swimsuits (in case we decided to go swimming), diaper bag, my gym bag & so on. Then to get inside, a bathroom stop for Hudson, sign them in, put shoes back on, name tags on & handing them over.
They’re all great about it… Except one… Hudson runs away from me as fast as he can, barely giving me a hug & saying bye. Emmalyn slowly walks in. Looking over her shoulder at me waiting for me to tell her it’s okay & to have fun. Landry…. She is in an awful seperation anxiety phase (at least I hope it’s a phase) ever since her hospital stay in December. She screams, cries, throws herself on the ground kicking & flailing. At first, I tortured everyone & stayed trying to calm her. I’ve learned it’s best to just walk away. She calms down within two minutes. As soon as she knows I’m gone.
Sometimes (especially those first couple weeks) I’m called back, mid-workout to go change a diaper, to give a snack, to soothe a sad child. It was frustrating. I think one day, I was called back 4 times in an hour.
I was really concerned about Hudson. I don’t talk about it much but Hudson has a speech delay & I was really worried about his ability to communicate & play with large groups of kids. When he gets frustrated, or doesn’t know how to communicate effectively with his peers, he tends to lash out – by hitting & pushing. He is also very stingy & wants everything any other kid has. I constantly worry about how others see him. I worry they will think he’s a horrible kid, that he’s a jerk, that I’m a bad mom. I thought for sure we would get kicked out of the gym. But, we haven’t & he’s been insanely well behaved… Except for one incident. Which if you ask me, isn’t so bad for 50+ trips to the daycare. Obviously we had a talk but nothing has happened since & I felt I was partially to blame as we went at 3:30pm, with no naps, before dinner.
His speech & behavior has actually improved!!! And the staff is SO wonderful & patient with him.
I made up my mind & knew that while it was a lot of work, we all need the gym. Even if a 1-2 hour workout turned into a half day adventure.
Our routine changed so much.
I started prepping breakfast for the week on Sunday’s. I always chuckled at people who took so much time to meal prep. Who has that kind of time & why would you want to waste time you could be spending with your family, on cooking? Jokes on me. I spent 20 minutes making those meals. Saving me 20+ minutes a day (or 2.5+ hours a week).
When I’d wake up in the morning (before my kids, at 5am, two hours earlier then I was waking up), I would grab some coffee, start the dishwasher, drink an entire cup (or three) of coffee. Pick up some random things around the house, start a load of laundry & get dressed in my gym clothes… Before my kids ever even woke up.
When my kids woke up, I’d change them, get them dressed in actual clothes instead of rocking the pjs all day, everyday. Bring them to the kitchen, nuke their breakfast (a whopping 1 minute, 20 seconds), slice some fruit & they’d eat while I unloaded the dishwasher, wiped the kitchen down, swept & maybe even a quick mop. Then I’d immediately put the dishes in the dishwasher, wash their trays & clean up their mess from breakfast.
I’d get everyone changed & we’d head out to the gym.
We were all exhausted by the time we got home from the gym. I’d keep the music up, talk to the kids & open the windows to keep them awake on our drives home. We would have lunch & I’d put all three kids down for nap. I forgot how much I love when all my kids nap 🙌🏻
It was so tempting to take a nap with them. But I don’t. Instead, I clean (sweeping the whole house, mopping, vacuuming, cleaning the play room & bathrooms), do laundry, organize a closet or some days, I just sat on the deck enjoying a hot cup of coffee.
If I hadn’t already planned or started dinner, I’d figure it out while they napped.
When they woke up, the house was clean, we’d have snack, I’d start the dishwasher again, then we had craft & school activities. Some days we watched a movie & had popcorn just because we could & it was cold out. Before my husband & dad came home, most days, I would clean the playroom again, vacuum again & then start dinner.
When dinner was done, dishes were immediately loaded into the dishwasher, the kids would either go play or have bath & the kitchen was cleaned.
The kids would be tired & fall asleep almost immediately after we left their room. My husband & I would go clean the playroom, the kitchen, swap & fold laundry & vacuum – we vacuum a lot in our house. At least twice a day as I let the kids have crackers at the kid table & they sometimes (ha! Most times) don’t keep them there.
Our house was clean. Not perfect, but way cleaner then it was before. We would go to bed to a clean house & wake up to a clean house.
Things started taking less time. Be it loading the kids up to go places, making dinner, picking up the house. We could find things easier, we were throwing things out left & right, when we saw a mess or crap on the floor, we would tend to it immediately.
I was so tired at night. Seriously, exhausted (ask my dad, he had to wake me up one night when Hudson was awake at 1am raising hell with the dogs 😳). I used to stay up at all hours watching Netflix. Since going to the gym, I could barely make it through a single episode. But I woke up feeling so refreshed. I was sleeping less but less tired through the day & I had more energy.
I found myself yelling less (Yeah. Really bad flaw of mine. I’m not proud of it). I wouldn’t get so worked up over trivial things. I had more patience with my kids (and husband 😬). I wasn’t feeling as overwhelmed as I was before. I felt like I was breathing easier, less anxiety. I didn’t feel so exhausted & worn out that I just wanted to let my kids go play independently, I was interacting more with them. I was allowing messes (from crafts, activities, sensory bins) to be made without losing my shit because it was an easy clean up.
My kids weren’t getting bored & being as mischievous. They weren’t acting out as much. Their appetites improved.
With increased appetites in 3 toddlers, I was at the grocery store more. I found myself reading labels (who does that?!? 😜), buying TONS of fruit & veggies. We’ve always been big on fruits & veggies. But now, half or more of our grocery bill was fruit & veggies. I’m buying less crap, and cooking healthier. I swear the cashier looked at me like I was crazy when I had 6 cucumbers, a cantaloupe, 6 peppers, watermelon, lettuce, raspberries, apples, oranges & more then came back a couple days later for the same things.
Some of this stuff has been intentional changes, others, not so much. It literally just happened. I couldn’t be happier with the improvements – well. That’s a lie. I’d be happier to be down 30lbs 😜
The changes in my weight aren’t coming as quickly as the other things above. Which is annoying. And frustrating. But eventually, I’ll see something more then a few pounds & toning. My clothes are fitting nicer. Some are way too big which is great.
But….
Yep…. That’s a but.
But now, I’m going insane.
I’m being a responsible adult & I had to put my membership on hold for a month. Or at least for a few weeks. Hence why you haven’t seen all my awesome gym posts.
It’s for personal reasons. It’s not really personal. It’s money. We have the money. I can spend the money. There’s just something else I want, so I’m making a temporary sacrifice to get something bigger.
As my dad always (annoyingly) tells me, “I need to see the bigger picture”.
Y’all have no idea how much I dislike when he says that to me. It hits a nerve. But here I am, doing it. Even if it is driving me insane.
I’ve become addicted to the gym & I’m going insane without it.
I expect each & every one of you reading this to make sure my gym membership is active & going no later then April 1st. – As if Hudson begging me every.single.day to go to the gym isn’t going to be enough.
Unless you think I should start a GoFundMe? 😜😂
I’m obviously joking. There are much greater causes out there.
I’ll just have to suffer through some lame at home, online workouts 🙄😑 which I hate. And are not doing me like the gym was.
I AM NOT FALLING OFF THE WAGON. As soon as my bigger item is acquired, you’ll see my reactivation post. Until then, let’s pray I don’t get put in an institution.
